A Ship With No Sails
by ten million fireflies
Summary: "And eventually, she realized how much he mattered, not just to her but to the entire camp." Lacy reflects on Percy's disappearance. Pre-TLH.


_Meh. Not sure how I feel about this. But I hadn't attempted to write a fanfiction in forever and it just sort of popped into my mind. I'm not exactly certain why Lacy is my go-to perspective lately, but it is what it is. I'm also not certain if it says in TLH when Lacy arrived at CHB, and I know I had her fighting in the war during "Regrets," but for the purpose of this story let's pretend she arrived in the wave of newly claimed campers right after TLO. _

_I disclaim._

* * *

><p>She barely even knew him.<p>

Then why did it matter so much that he was gone?

If Rachel, Thalia, Grover, and Nico, his best friends, could stop missing their comrade long enough to conduct a mass search of the country for him…

…if Chiron, his mentor, could forget the worries for his life long enough to consider all the theories of his location…

…if Tyson, his brother, could put aside his longing for his big brother long enough to help repair the flying chariot they were using to search for him…

…if Annabeth, his girlfriend, di immortales, could plug the gaping hole in her heart long enough to search for him as well as lead an entire camp in his absence…

…then what right did she, Lacy, have to cry over Percy Jackson's disappearance?

She was not his family, his friend, his teacher. She had never known or taught or loved him. She hadn't even fought under his command, like so many of the other demigods, as she hadn't even known her mother was Aphrodite until after the Titan War.

She had no personal connection to Perseus Jackson, hero of Olympus and son of Poseidon, whatsoever. They had never held more than a few minutes' shallow conversation.

But somehow, that morning when she walked to the mess hall and saw Annabeth and Chiron's grave faces, noticed the eerie, worried silence, and took in the fact that a certain black - haired green - eyed wise - cracking hero was not present, her heart split right down the middle.

The question was, why?

Perhaps it was because she was a daughter of Aphrodite- she could, after all, sense emotions, even hidden ones, particularly well. She felt Nico's quiet despair, Chiron's hidden worry, Grover and Tyson's distress. Being a daughter of Aphrodite, she was also rather good, of course, with cosmetics. And she could recognize Thalia's switch from normal to waterproof eyeliner, traces left behind by tears that rolled down Rachel's powdered face, and carefully applied foundation on Annabeth's usually make-up free face to hide signs of crying. Lacy knew, after all, how to disguise tears, and as one who felt emotions so well she also was particularly empathetic. So perhaps that's all her heartbreak was- one of empathy.

But maybe-just perhaps-it went so much deeper than that.

Perhaps Percy's absence affected her because she had never known a Camp Half-Blood without him. When she had traveled over the camp borders, her clothing soaked to a paper-thin consistency from the violent thunderstorm and nearly passed out from exhaustion, it had, she later found out, been he that had reported her arrival to the Apollo cabin. In a way, he was responsible for her recovery. Later, when she was lucid, Chiron had showed her an explanatory video of her situation- and it had been Percy's warm voice narrating the newest section, explaining the circumstances and victory of the Second Titan War. The first thought she had as an aware demigod was that someday she wanted to do something great - to be a hero like Percy.

And he was there, every day thereafter. She noticed him sitting at the Poseidon table, breakfast, lunch, and dinner. She admired his extraordinary talent during sword fighting lessons and demonstrations. She giggled along with her sisters as the Aphrodite bevy discussed his adorable relationship with Annabeth.

And eventually, she realized how much he mattered, not just to her but to the entire camp. Percy Jackson, Son of Poseidon, was not just an ordinary camper- he was their leader, their hero. A role model to all the younger campers and a friend and comrade to all the older ones. He was the anchor of the camp- no, not the anchor, but the sails, for he was what kept them moving and hoping and living.

But Percy Jackson, Son of Poseidon, was missing. And the more she thought about it, the more she realized her right to feel abandoned. Because if a ship loses its sails, it is not just the captain that notices. No, it is the entire crew, every single living being person aboard that ship, that feels the utter standstill of their absence.

For without those sails to catch the wind, how is a ship to carry on?


End file.
